Let Downs

Can you think of a time when someone close to you let you down? I bet it’s not hard for you to think of an example. In fact, for some, it may be difficult to think of a single person who hasn’t let you down at some point.

Maybe someone you love wasn’t there for you when you needed them. Maybe someone shared something you told them in confidence with someone else. Maybe you found out someone you thought was a friend was talking badly about you to others.

Maybe someone close to you didn’t show up to an important function of yours. Maybe someone broke a promise to you. Maybe your child veered away from a godly path. Maybe your parents gave up on you or neglected you.

Maybe someone said hurtful things to you. Maybe someone introduced you to an ungodly addiction. Maybe you were cheated on, abandoned, abused, ignored, bypassed, deceived, or insulted.

I think it’s safe to say that if you interact with someone long enough, at some point he or she will disappoint you, hurt you, and/or fail you in some way. It’s inevitable because we’re all human. Nobody can please everyone, and none of us are even close to being perfect.

Therefore, every one of us fails, some of us more than others. People upset us, make fun of us, hurt us, and disappoint us, and we do the same to others, even though we sometimes don’t realize it.

Each of us will let the ones we love down at some point. Even though you may have pure intentions, sometimes we (as human beings) just take things the wrong way.

It’s important to remember that despite what others may do to us, because we’re all human, we all sin. “…for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God…” (Romans 3:23). Now, the key word is “all…” not a few, not men, not women, not unbelievers, but ALL of us.

Even Jesus, who lived a sinless life, recognized human fallibility within Himself as He spoke to the man who came to Him seeking eternal life. “’Why do you call me good?’ Jesus answered. ‘No one is good-except God alone.’” (Mark 10:18)

Sometimes we can overcome being let down, as things can often be easily fixed such as a silly argument or a misunderstanding. However, some actions are harder to forgive, and bonds can sometimes be broken forever. Sin hurts not just us but those around us as well.

When we disappoint and sin against others, we lose their trust. Trust is important in interactions with those close to us. We become close to others because we can trust them, and they us. Marriage, friendship, working relationships, teams…those are all based on trust and commitment. When trust is lost, the relationship falters.

I’ve heard some say that the only person in the world they can trust is themselves. However, if you think about it, can we really trust ourselves that much?

We are often influenced by external things that can skew our decisions and actions. For example, strong emotions often make us act in ways that we may not under normal circumstances. Additionally, hormones can influence our mood which can impact our choices.

Mood altering substances, such as alcohol and drugs can also cause us to act in ways we wouldn’t have if we had a clear head. Peer pressure and social media can influence us in ways we don’t realize. My pastor spoke today about doing things because we want others to like us. That need for social interaction and closeness to others certainly plays a role in our actions.

Additionally, social media outlets can suck you in until you are so emersed in how others’ lives appear that you lose sight of your own and what God has called you to do. “Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods.” (Psalm 40:4)

Biased information, such as that provided to us by news outlets can influence us as well. Everyone has their own agendas, and it can be difficult to differentiate between truth and lie at times. Emotions run high, and we sometimes do and say things we shouldn’t.

The Bible even warns us about trusting ourselves in Proverbs 28:26, “Those who trust in themselves are fools, but those who walk in wisdom are kept safe.”

But here is one truth for you…the only being in whom we can fully trust is the Lord. How do I know this? First, because of personal experience. Second, because the Bible is full of examples that support this.

Touch of Faith

We can find one example of a biblical woman who experienced let downs in life in three different gospels. You can read about her story in Matthew 9:20-22, Mark 5:24-34, and Luke 8:42-48.

What’s interesting about this woman is that we don’t know much about her; we don’t even know her name! What we do know, however, is how she suffered and how she triumphed over her suffering.

This woman had a bleeding disorder she suffered from for twelve years. Can you imagine?

If you know anything about the Hebrew culture or this particular period in history, someone having such a medical condition would have been deemed by others as “unclean.” Therefore, the woman had likely been shunned by her family, friends, and community.

Mark 5:26 tell us that the woman spent all the money she had seeking healing treatments, and though “She had suffered a great deal under the care of many doctors,” her condition become worse rather than better.

She had been let down by everyone she knew. For twelve years she suffered, likely completely alone in the world.

However, she still had hope and faith in Jesus Christ. As Jesus was walking with his disciples, a large crowd surrounded Him. The woman suffering from bleeding was in that crowd.

“When she heard about Jesus, she came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, because she thought, ‘If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.’ Immediately her bleeding stopped and she felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering.’” (Mark 5:27-29)

What’s even more amazing about this story is that the woman’s healing wasn’t even a purposeful action by Jesus.

As you read in the story, Jesus knew someone had touched Him and that power had gone out from Him because He felt it. When He asked the crowd who had touched Him, his disciples were even confused because there were people crowded all around Jesus, so many people were touching Him.

However, the woman, knowing she had been healed from touching Jesus, came before Him in fear and told Jesus that she had touched Him and why.

Instead of being angry or affronted, Jesus in kindness and love told the woman, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.” (Mark 6:34)

Although every person in her life had failed her, the woman still had faith in Jesus, her Lord, and that faith and trust in Him is what changed her life.

Jesus can change your life too if you put your trust in Him. One of my favorite Bible verses is John 15:13, which reads, “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.”

Jesus is the greatest friend you could ever have. He died for you, a terrible death, to give you a chance at life eternal. Don’t waste that sacrifice. Accept that gift, and you will never be alone.

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” (Psalm 46:1)

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand.” (Isaiah 41:10)

Unrealized Expectations

It’s hard when you place expectations on others that go unfulfilled. One of the difficult lessons I’ve learned in life is that no matter how hard you try, you can’t change someone. Only God can do that, and the person must also want to change for it to come to fruition. If they aren’t willing to change, it’s never going to happen.

I often struggle with unrealized expectations, especially in my marriage. My husband and I agree on many things, but we also disagree on a lot. We have different priorities in life and place more weight on different things that are important to us. This can cause difficulty and strain in our relationship at times. Do you deal with this in your relationships as well?

I know I don’t always make life easy for my husband either. Marriage is hard, but it’s important to remember why God brought you together in the first place. We each have our issues, but we’re also blessed to have one another. Despite our faults, we also bring many strengths to our partnership.

There is a picture that hangs on the wall of my house with the serenity prayer on it. It’s there right as you come through the entrance, and it reads, God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things that I can, and wisdom to know the difference.

I love that prayer, and I placed it in a prominent place in my home for a reason. I don’t know about you, but rough days can be a common occurrence in my life. I use the serenity prayer as kind of an ode to myself regarding how I want to live out my life…how I want to deal with those difficult things, especially when it comes to dealing with people who can make my life very trying.

We may feel that God lets us down at times, but the truth is it’s not Him who lets us down but our own expectations of Him that fail. We try to force our own agendas and plans onto our lives when that may not be God’s plan for us at all. Then, we feel let down when things don’t go how we think they should, when they were never headed in that direction in the first place.

Take heart in these words from Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

Christians are human and sin daily as well. Therefore, it’s important to realize we also disappoint and hurt the Lord. Luckily, our God is a merciful, forgiving, and loving God who sticks by us even when we do fail him.

“Because of the Lord’s faithful love we do not perish, for his mercies never end. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:22-23)

When we try our best and fail, God still loves us, just as when those close to us fail us, we still love them even though we may feel hurt or disappointed. Putting all your trust in a person will never serve you well, but putting all your trust in the Lord will never leave you heartbroken.

“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” (Psalm 107:1)

We live in a broken world full of chaos, and it’s often hard to navigate life with a positive attitude. While the world is broken, we can also be broken at times, whether it’s physically, mentally, or spiritually. Just remember that through it all, God is for us.

Romans 8:31 reminds us, “What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?”

Remember that no matter who lets you down in life, no matter what struggle you are going through, no matter how bleak your future appears, God loves you. He is here for you. He is on your team. He has your back.

He will never fail to show up when you need Him. He will never speak badly about you. He will never lead you down the wrong path. He will never give up on you. When you seek Him and cling to Him, He will never let you down.

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:38-39)

Have a blessed week!

-Becky